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I’ve been waiting for this for a long time

Dolphins are dumb:

The study, by the University of the Witwatersrand’s Paul Manger, claims the large brains of marine mammals such as dolphins and whales are to help cope with being warm-blooded in cold water and not a sign of intelligence.

He argues the dolphin, widely regarded as one of the smartest mammals, does not display enough sophistication in its behaviour to show any more intelligence than a lab rat or goldfish.

“When you look at the structure of the dolphin brain you see it is not built for complex information processing,” Professor Manger said.

“You put an animal in a box, even a lab rat or gerbil, and the first thing it wants to do is climb out of it. If you don’t put a lid on top of the bowl a goldfish will eventually jump out.

“But a dolphin will never do that. In the marine parks the dividers to keep the dolphins apart are only a foot or two above the water between the different pools.”

Why not? Because, Professor Manger says, the thought would simply not cross their minds.

I had fights with teachers going back to fifth grade about dolphins, the Endangered Species Act and other environmental drivel. Finally though, we find out that dolphin free tuna is unnecessary…the dolphin and the tuna are just about intellectual equals.

I doubt any of my old teachers read the blog. Too bad.


3 Responses

  1. great post.

    My only rebuttal might be that while goldfish realize they are trapped in an enclosed space and may be cognizent enough to attempt to jump out of the bowl, maybe the reason dolphinsdon’t try a similar escape act at Sea World is due to the fact that they are intelligent enough to know their attempt is futile. Maybe not. Either way, I agree with you. I’ve always thought dolphins were lame.

    In fact the best proof for the intelligence (or lack thereof) in dolphins might be their starting QB Daunte Culpepper. (Rimshot)

  2. Flipper got his own TV show, for years.

    Think this Manger guy has HIS own TV show?

    And Manger says Flipper’s dumb? Yeah, right, like a fox.

  3. Dophin has a decent taste to it.

    Too bad they catch and release with those big tuna nets.

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